Tuesday, February 17, 2004

Never Satisfied

Had I asked myself five years ago how I would feel if I were married to a beautifult intelligent woman that I love more everyday, if I were father to a beautiful young girl, if I were employed as a fulltime professor of philosophy, if I owned a home and collected a group of friends both locally and more distant, I imagine the word "Happy" would have been one of the words I spoke.
And yet...I feel more stressed and sad then I have in some time.
I am stressed by my work. I feel that I might lose my job. I worry that I won't be able to afford the house payments. Little Sophie seems to prefer crying to any other form of communication, and I can never seem to assuage her. I am for the first time in a long time feeling sad. It is weird.
I am not miserable, I am just sad. I hope this will go away soon.
The school thing will resolve itself one way, the money thing is not so bad, Sophie is probably just in a stage. She so beautiful, Carly is my true love, I still love to teach. I just need to get this through my head.


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